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| 'Tis but a dream in the forest of green, 'Tis but a sadness submerged. Nought can be heard of my whispered word For something is coming between. Yes, you can write of the water of life With phrases so buoyant and fine But I stay below and unbearably so; The green world out there isn't mine.
Thanks to The Mag
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2012/04/22
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11 comments:
I really like how you worked the rhyme.
i like the bouyant phrases
altered states
Very mystical feel to this... I like!
the world of life outside these walls is not mine...shivers at the utter aloneness of this...
Such a great sense of mystery...I really love this..
Beautiful...this one is crying out for some music...
Stunning, just stunning!
Simply beautiful, I really enjoyed this :)
A fish out of water , metaphorically speaking !
I am with Laurie... nice take on the prompt!
JJRod'z
A super jump-off image
the separation/ distance very well evoked
I always rather like poems that rhyme
what poetry was supposed to do before it got too clever by half....
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