2012/12/02

Unwind


                                                       I have been wound
                                my vision
                                                 moves regularly
                                     repetitively
                                                    relentlessly
                                  matching
                                                   my inner drive
                                    my constancy 
                                               source of strength
                             to others
                                                         who pattern 
                                 their music
                                                      on my rhythm
                                   my symmetry
                                                      my constancy
                                   comfortable
                                                          predictable
                                 determined
                                                  playing their parts
                           praised 
                                                      for expectations
                              approved
                                                              for certainty
                                        no subtle threat
                                                                easily heard 

                                                    rewind me?
                                                  no
                                                    close me?
                                                   please

                                                   let my tapered box
                                                    vibrate
                                                      to the jazz
                                                      spirit freedom


Thanks to The Mag

16 comments:

Listening Daisy said...

You're right, ours are a bit similar. I really enjoyed your take on it, especially your wording.

Catfish Tales said...

Ah, a kindred spirit

Brian Miller said...

smiles...i like the contrast between the constancy and freedom in this....

Magaly Guerrero said...

"the jazz spirit freedom "

I can taste those words. I like what they do to my senses ;-)

Kathe W. said...

jazz spirit freedom vs constancy- love it!

Laurie Kolp said...

I love the visual back and forth like a metronome.

Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger said...

Or to the push/pull of classical beyond the boundaries of the metronomic--beautiful write!

ReBelle said...

Sweet!

Berowne said...

I too have been wound. No re-wind, please. :-)

Lolly said...

I noticed immediately the rigid way this poem is arranged matches the words. It could possibly be a concrete poem. A visual treat as well as a literary one. Nice work!

Wayne Pitchko said...

nicely done...thanks for sharing

Helen said...

Perfect! Last stanza blew me away, I could slow dance to it ........

Tess Kincaid said...

We both went with "un" this week...love your jazzy spirit...

Emma Major said...

My constancy a source of strength - perfect

~T~ said...

I guess even a metronome needs a rest. Nice one!

Robyn Greenhouse said...

love how you incorporated the metronome feel into your poem!

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